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Something I have noticed about many different mental health stories I have heard about, is that the people in the lives of those with depression or those dealing with depression themselves, often come across looking selfish. It is incredibly challenging to set boundaries when it comes to people with depression. It is also difficult for those with depression to set boundaries with other people. Boundaries often come across as pure selfishness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The trouble is that it is alright to set boundaries when it comes to taking care of your own mental health. Looking back at the past and the time that I spent with Kody, I can think of many times where it was challenging to respect his boundaries. Sometimes being around certain members of his family harmed his mental health, but I would make him go anyway to fulfill some sort of obligation. I wanted him to be someone that other people could trust. So when he said he’d do something and then wanted to back out, I tried to make him fulfill those promises. I wish I hadn’t now, but at the time they didn’t feel like boundaries, they felt like him being ridiculous. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I didn’t really understand that he was depressed initially, since he didn’t say that. If he didn’t want to go to work, it felt like he was just trying to cop out and not fulfill a responsibility. When he didn’t get chores done around the house because he was too tired, it felt like he was disrespecting me and the work that I did. I don’t know what the right thing to do would have been. When someone is depressed and treatment won’t help, it seems wrong to just let them lay around all the time. The truth is, there wasn’t anything I could do. Feeling helpless and out of control was hard for me<\/a>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n